To empower girls with skills for communicating with their parents & family
It's normal to talk to friends more than you talk to your parents. But there are some things you might want or need to talk to your parents about.
How to talk to Parents.
Sometimes you need some advice and some things are just embarrassing to talk to your friends about. There's always the issue of will your parents understand and will parents listen, and they might be with your parents listen to your point of view?
Can you be bothered? A lot of time the answer is NO!
But it is worth the effort. There is a lot to be gained from getting your parents on side. Yes, they are always difficult conversations but getting the journey started is important.
At least they will start to see where you are coming from even if they don't get it on day one.
And you know what, being able to chat with your parents can make it an easier environment to be in at home.
When parents feel connected to your daily life, they can be there for you if something really important comes up.
It can be easy to forget that your parents were once your age too and so might not be as alien to what you want to talk about as you think!
We want you to have the confidence to speak to your parents and give you the skills you need so you can say why you want to talk in a way that communicates what you need.
Talking to family really can help.
And then there's the rest of the family... communicating can consist of lots of battles but home should be your sanctuary.
It should be your place to feel safe to be who you really are, to have a break - and isn't that place nicer if you get on with everyone?
Websites Offering Support:
DVIP Yuva Service
offers confidential support for young people ages 11-18 (up to 25 for young people with additional needs) who want to change their behaviour, develop improved awareness of healthy communication and relationships. They help young people to look at their abusive behaviour and find safe, non-abusive alternatives.
Impact Factory
run a number of courses but also have some useful information on communication skills available on their website.
Kidshealth.org
Are you putting yourself down? If so, you’re not alone. As a teen, you’re going through lots of changes in your body. And, as your body changes, so does your image of yourself. It’s not always easy to like every part of your looks, but when you get stuck on the negatives it can really bring down your self-esteem.
Our Everyday Life
offers a useful article on communicating with your parents.
SupportLine
Supportline is for children and teens going through a difficult time but feeling unable to talk to their parents about how they are feeling and what is happening. You may be, for example, being bullied, struggling with an eating disorder, self-harming, and/or generally feeling depressed.
Books on this subject:
A Smart Girl’s Guide to Understanding Her Family
This book helps girls understand feelings, fighting and figuring it out with your family. It looks at how to get along with parents and stop fights with siblings before they start. It gives you tools to negotiate solutions to problems and family fights.
Every Teenager’s Little Black Book on How to Get Along with Your Parents
“Great book for teenagers that need guidance!!! every parent should buy this for their child. it is written very simply and to the point with great examples.” Amazon Review
Starving the Anger Gremlin: A Cognitive Behavioural Therapy Workbook on Anger Management for Young People (Gremlin and Thief CBT Workbooks)
Meet the anger gremlin: a troublesome pest whose favourite meal is your anger, and the more he eats the angrier you get! There’s only one way to stop him: starve him of angry feelings and behaviours, and make him disappear. This imaginative workbook shows young people how to starve their anger gremlin and control their anger effectively. Made up of engaging and fun activities, it helps them to understand why they get angry and how their anger affects themselves and others, and teaches them how to manage angry thoughts and behaviours. The tried-and-tested programme, based on effective cognitive behavioural therapy principles, can be worked through by a young person on their own or with a practitioner or parent, and is suitable for children and young people aged 10+. “Starving the Anger Gremlin” is easy to read and fun to complete, and is an ideal anger management resource for those working with young people including counsellors, therapists, social workers and school counsellors, as well as parents.
We Need To Talk: How to Have Conversations That Matter
Take a moment to consider how many outcomes in your life may have been affected by poor communication skills. Could you have gotten a job you really wanted? Saved a relationship? What about that political conversation that got out of hand at a dinner party? How is it that we so often fail to say the right thing at the right time?
In her career as an NPR host, journalist Celeste Headlee has interviewed hundreds of people from all walks of life, and if there’s one thing she’s learned, it’s that it’s hard to overestimate the power of conversation and its ability to both bridge gaps and deepen wounds. In We Need to Talk, she shares what she’s learned on the job about how to have effective, meaningful, and respectful conversations in every area of our lives.
Now more than ever, Headlee argues, we must begin to talk to and, more importantly, listen to one another – including those with whom we disagree. We Need to Talk gives readers ten simple tools to help facilitate better conversations, ranging from the errors we routinely make (put down the smart phone when you’re face to face with someone) to the less obvious blind spots that can sabotage any conversation, including knowing when not to talk, being aware of our own bias, and avoiding putting yourself in the centre of the discussion.
Whether you’re gearing up for a big conversation with your boss, looking to deepen or improve your connection with a relative, or trying to express your child’s needs to a teacher, We Need to Talk will arm you with the skills you need to create a productive dialogue.
Why Your Parents Are Driving You Up the Wall and What To Do About It: THE BOOK EVERY TEENAGER NEEDS TO READ
After years of reliable performance, has something recently gone wrong with your parents? Do you find yourself stressed out, arguing about the most ridiculous things? Is it like you and your parents are processing the same world with entirely different brains?
There are hundreds of books for parents about how to deal with you. Now, doctor of brains and international bestselling author, Dean Burnett, has written a book for YOU to understand just what on earth is going on with your parents. Like, just WHY are your parents:
– Obsessed with tidiness
– Not letting you get enough sleep
– Just generally not getting anything that’s important to you!
But don’t worry. These are very normal parent malfunctions, and by understanding the science behind where they’re coming from, you’ll know exactly how to troubleshoot conflict when it occurs (and even fix it before it does).
You’ll never be able to completely remove arguments. But imagine life if you weren’t wasting all that time and energy arguing about tidying your room.
