Helping daughters feel positive about looking after their ageing parents
As you get older, so do your parents and then after a certain age they become less able than they used to and begin to need assistance. Sometimes, you're able to provide some or all of what they need and sometimes you aren't. You might feel obliged to help or want to, you might feel physically able or limited, but either way this comes with the emotional reminder that somewhere ahead is the loss of your parent. Resources are available so that you don't need to feel alone and feel more empowerment to take on this role or find alternatives for where you are unable to do the role(s) yourself.
Websites Offering Support:
Royal Voluntary Service
Their volunteers can help your ageing parent in all sorts of ways. They :
- Drive people that can’t get out and about to GP or hospital appointments, shopping trips and to local social events and activities.
- Run clubs and groups in local communities where older people can socialise, take part in interesting activities and enjoy something to eat and drink.
- Provide practical help and companionship, deliver books to those who love reading but can’t get to their local library.
- Provide exercise classes, activities and companionship for ageing people in hospital and support them with their return home.
- Run hospital welcome desks and Hospital Shops, Cafés and Trolley Services.
Independent Age
helps older people across the UK to live well with dignity, choice and control.
Funeral Services Guide
aims to be the only online resource that you’ll ever need when handling your, or your loved one’s final affairs, covering everything from coping emotionally, to step-by-step guides on handling practicalities with minimal stress.
Carers UK
Carers UK is there to give carers support. They are there to listen, to give you expert information and advice that’s tailored to your situation. They are also there to support you in finding new ways to manage at home, at work, or wherever you are. Looking after someone can be tough, but you’re not on your own.
Carers Trust
With a UK wide network of quality assured independent partners, and through the provision of grants, they help carers get the extra help they need to live their own lives.
The locally based Network Partners help to support carers in their homes to provide replacement care. They also provide information, advice, emotional support, hands on practical help and access to much needed breaks.
Books on this subject:
Time To Help Your Parents
A practical guide to recognising problems and providing support (ageing parents)
This book will help you to understand your parents’ perspectives and enjoy your relationships with them as they grow older. It helps you to tackle the small, practical, problems that crop up daily such as shopping, nutrition, cleaning and reduced mobility. It also looks at the bigger, more complex issues such as independence, health, changing roles, accommodation and financial issues.
Setting Boundaries With Your Aging (Ageing) Parents
This book is for adult children who long for a better relationship and improved boundaries with their ageing parents. More so, for those who want to stopa never-ending cycle of chaos, crisis, or drama. The author teaches readers how to apply the “6 Steps to SANITY”: S-STOP your own negative behavior, A-ASSEMBLE a support group, N-NIP excuses in the bud, I-IMPLEMENT rules and boundaries, T-TRUST your instincts, Y-YIELD everything to God.
Coping with Your Difficult Older Parent
A Guide for Stressed Out Children of a Difficult Older Parent
Although there’s no medical definition for “difficult” older parent, you know when you have one. While it’s rare for adults to change their ways late in life, you can stop the vicious merry-go-round of anger, blame, guilt and frustration. This book is a common-sense guide from professionals, with more than two decades in the field, on how to smooth communications with a challenging older parent. It addresses many hard issues, including:
- How to deal with refusing to stop driving.
- How to say they cannot live with you.
- How to asses the risk factors in deciding whether they are still able to live alone.
- How to avoid the cycle of nagging and recriminations.
- How to prevent the negativity from overwhelming you.
Aging Parents: How to Care for Ageing Parents
One of the most difficult and challenging times in my life was caring for my parent with Alzheimer’s Disease. Looking back upon it now it was also one of the most rewarding times in my life. This book will act as a guide for what lies ahead as the years progress. It contains proven steps and strategies on how to effectively provide for your ageing parents.
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